I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Randomize
