Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Randomize
