I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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