if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
