Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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