I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize
