I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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