Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
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WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
