I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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