There is no way he is gay with that hair.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
