You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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