I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
