my sisters under your porch take her home
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Randomize
