hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
