Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Randomize
