wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
