dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
i think my mom watched the whole time
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
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