yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
