Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
