you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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