I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Randomize
