1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
