He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
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