"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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