NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
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