Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Randomize
