That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
