Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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