its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
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