His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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