He managed to light the Jello on fire...
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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