hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
