It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
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