So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Randomize
