Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(615): View more from Tennessee

so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me

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(541): View more from Oregon

I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night

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(919): View more from North Carolina

I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.

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(804): View more from Virginia

NEVER shave your cleavage hair.

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(502): View more from Kentucky

I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer

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(248): View more from Michigan

I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"

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(847): View more from Illinois

On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.

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(630): View more from Illinois

You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.

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(727): View more from Florida

Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.

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