Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I think your dad took our porno
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Randomize
