I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Randomize
