Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
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