I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize
