I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Randomize
