hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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