Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
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