Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
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