Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
