so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Randomize
