Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Randomize
