Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Randomize
