i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
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