please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
