He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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